Time Capsule
That’s what these posts are right?
Isolated thoughts and incidents in our lives that we see fit to expose to the world.
Once they are dug up, of course.
Not all serious but fun and absurd too. Open to all but understand by few.
Fabricated truth we pass off as convenient lies.
I’ve been sick since Oct. Nothing serious but I haven’t been getting better.
It’s due to my lack of sleep but not to lack of rest.
I don’t work out, run or paddle anymore yet I’m not well.
It’s a horrible feeling, dying.
Especially when you don’t have a life threatening disease or situation.
It’s wasted upon you and it makes you feel worse.
Vicious, cycles are.
I am in the state of my life where I can choose anything.
Choices I make now mean a whole lot then.
Is he a good man… and if so what does it mean to me?
I’m going to college and I’m going to split up with my girlfriend.
We always do the distance thing so it wouldn’t be a new experience.
We’ll both party, her more than me but that’s how it always is.
She wants to experiment
so I’ll see how, if at all, she likes the company of women.
I will, at first, act content and confident with the new friends I make
But I’ll fall into old habits and end up with a girl.
She’ll be pretty and attractive, everything I want.
But they’ll be several of her and I can’t choose one.
But maybe I’ll give one the pleasure of something
I haven’t given a girl yet.
I could ask one of them out, you know… on a date.
Never have before. Never had the guts.
However, I’ll have the guts to see Jillian.
We’ll take a trip and end up in each others arms.
That’s how I see it but perhaps I’m being young and foolish.
Maybe we aren’t meant to be…
But I have chosen to be the final judge of that.
It is my right.
I don’t dream anymore.
What I vaguely remember in the mornings
can’t be called dreams.
They are shadows of what once was.
When the dreams return I’ll find myself again.
Till then I’ll follow my trend and hope to mend.